Be Your Own God

With respect to "Surreal this is..."

Be Your Own God...

2:23 pm IST,26-07-2011:

            Mili, the main character of today’s sayings called me and asked,  “Uncle, how are you”? I told her, “Dear, I am fine and I’ll call you back in the evening. We’ll talk a lot”.

4:30pm IST, 26-07-2011:

I opened my laptop after a cup of evening tea and got connected to your “blogspot”. I copied down your “Surreal this is…” to my desk top and closed the internet since I belonged to a lower middle class family headed by a school teacher and I know  values of my single rupee . I patiently went through your thoughts reflected on your blog. You had shown me a mirror through which I was looking at the image of your life that you had to pass for last some years(I don’t know your date of birth). After reading, I found myself wordless and looked at the speeding fan over my head in supine position and murmured again and again “Oh life, you have so many hues”. What I should say to Raman, a new friend (so declared by a social network “facebook” just  3-4  days back). I was looking for my God for an exact answer…but  could not.

6:30pm:

My wife called me and  asked me if I had a talk with Mili ? Mili talked to my wife after calling me. I said. “No, I am going to talk her in the evening”. What a coincidence, what a concordance! I exclaimed myself and requested my God to help Raman…

There are three characters including Mili in today’s sayings who will tell you their real life stories to you for your answer.

Mili, BA in Mathematics, MCA, 33 years married to an IT professional with a little son of 2 years. She lost her father at the age of just one and half year. At an age when  the small babies do not utter, papa/daddy clearly. She had another sister who was just 2 months of age at the time of their father’s last breath. Mili is just 4 years younger to me but calls me “Uncle” on account of my social position and assignments in their family. As per our age she should have called me “bhaiya”…But I always treat her as my niece as well as sister. These two small children were brought up with all the resources a lower middle class family could provide. Her mother who was dreaming a very colorful life with her husband had to wear and tear her shoulders at that tender age of hardly 19-20 years(1979-80. Just imagine the stature of a fresh widow in seventies in Indian social scenario with two-two small daughters on her lap. Our mothers can better understand it than us…

She joined a little primary school to earn bread for her and two daughters without any needed help from in-laws. This was not a story, this was another hue of our life. Today her mother is very proud of Mili. But I am too proud of her mother as well as Mili. I always tell their stories to them who confuse about life and its mercilessness towards us…

Nigam, 36 years male with a brother of 30 years. An elder sister, 39 years  who got married just 8 months and 6 months before the demise of their father and mother respectively. Father died of colon cancer and mother from milliary tuberculosis. Today these two brothers are ill famed in my village for all types of addiction, you can say alcohol, opium, alprazolam, diazepam etc etc….Both are married and each of them with one son respectively. Their family demands much needed responsibility from them. Their sister married to an engineer who is currently living in city of Tajmahal has already stopped visiting her brothers in my village 2 years back.

Priyanka, DOB-10/04/2006 lost her father on 12/11/2008 just at the age of 2 years 7 months. Her father happened to be my best friend who knew  about  me more than my own brother. He succumbed to aplastic anemia at the age of only 33 years. When I visit my village , I never miss it to give a visit to Priyanka who has exactly the same date of birth as my own daughter but one year junior to her. I buy dresses and chocolates for Priyanka on her birthday…Priyanka never asks about her father. She lost him when she did not know what does the word “father” define. She points her finger to her father’s grave yard   tells others that her father is sleeping there. Could you imagine dear I am just dropping tears while I am typing these words. Because he was my best friend who walked with me at a time when my own parents left my hands (For  your information, I married a girl whom I loved against their wish).May his soul rest in peace and what can I offer him more than my tears…!

Mili experienced and passed with a life for nearly 30 odd years without a father’s affection, guide and love. Nigam could not guide his life after his father’s demise. The little baby Priyanka will have to  experience the path Mili has walked through. And it is her mother’s look out to ensure it. As her father’s best friend I am bearing and feeling my task ahead. May “My God” help me to carry it out….

Do you believe in “God”? if yes my hardship will be less. If answer is “No” . I have to storm your and my brains…One day my communist lawyer friend asked me, “Who is God? What does he do everyday? How does he look”. I answered that our grandfathers, their grandfathers must not have seen “God”. Lord Jesus, Guru Nanak and Lord Mohmmed also never reported anywhere that they had seen God, so far as my information is concerned. I asked him if he had brought out any under trial prisoner today for bail? He suddenly replied a young man of 25 years booked under IPC 302 got a most deserved bail for my long sincere efforts. I instantly replied him to ask this guy that had he seen god/does he believe in God? The next day morning my friend  reported  me that the under trial boy made him  feel like “God”. God has no body, no shape, no gender, no color….God is all about of our good thoughts, good wishes, good deeds… We have a body, we have a mind, Great men say we have a soul, scientists started ensuring a spiritual health along with physical and mental health for human’s total well being. Know your spirit, know your soul. Refine it and polish it with all of your good thoughts, good deeds, wash it with your good tears which were dropped at others’  sufferings, make it colorful with your love felt for other human beings… These are heavenly qualities when they appear in you, you become the so called “God”. God is nowhere, but is our soul itself, our own spirit. Be your own “God”. Help yourself. Rise above all tears, all failures, all frustrations. “The other name of frustration is degradation”. Don’t degrade yourself like Nigam. Don’t loose  your near and dears like him. Try to grow up like Mili. Start a brand new life as if You are Priyanka, a little 4 years old sans father. Make a quiet environment, close your eyes, with natural deep breathing, relaxed muscles, heedless to distracting thoughts, arouse your soul to become your own “God”. Be your own “God”. Help yourself first and bail yourself out like my lawyer friend from the prison of frustration and sorrows… Feed your soul with sayings from “Bhagawad Gita”…Definitely you will feel like Phoenix. I assure and  affirm you…Take care and …Be your own “God”…Decide and define your own destiny…